I love to sing. I love to perform. I love to hear applause after I've shared my soul through song. I love the crowd. I love the costumes. I love the company. I love the sense of accomplishment. I love it all.So, it's strange to think, that after only 4 shows with Kimball Theatre, my run is over. I'm a Senior, and I'm leaving. Soon. My time as Sandy Dumbrowski is over, and my time as a high schooler is ending, too.
The night of my last performance, I really felt very little sadness. While others were crying during their "Senior Night" recognition, I was rather happy. "Thank GOODNESS. I can finally get out of here," was truly my most prominent thought. High School has not been a remarkably enjoyable experience for me, (though it has had many upsides) so I was thrilled to be receiving some proof of my impending release.
Lately, though, I've begun to feel a little different. I thought that after "Grease" ended, I would have plenty of time to do tons of things. Turns out, not really. College Applications. The name makes me shudder.
Future.
Scary.
Difficult.
Unknown.
That's pretty much what's going through my head right now.
So, even though it is a blessing to be a Senior and to be able to have a future rushing upon me, I want to slow down and talk about some of the blessings I've received through Kimball Theatre. It's been a fabulous experience for me, and I am so filled with gratitude.
I'm having trouble even beginning.
I am so grateful that I've had the opportunity to do what I LOVE. Getting to stay hours after school to sing isn't really all that bad a lot of the time. And on stage, singing is such an intimate experience. Singing to one, single person, can be a terrifying thing. Looking one person in the eye and singing is often simply awkward, nerve wracking and uncomfortable. But singing on a stage, it's a far different experience, and to me, almost a more intimate one. You can truly just SING. Being able to "hide" behind a character really allows you to share your true emotions, without the same fears that accompany normal communication. It's really extremely beautiful and liberating.I am so grateful for the people I've met. Some of my strongest, most wonderful relationships have been forged through my experiences with theater, and I am so grateful for it! What a wonderful support system, and so often an extremely dedicated one, too. It is awesome to have friends that share your interests, and that can gush about "Les Mis" and Ramin Karimloo with you.
I am so grateful for the support system OUTSIDE of theatre. I hadn't recognized how much support I receive until recently, when I saw how much my mom does for me, how supportive my friend group is, how patient all the wonderful parents are, how excited all my ward family is for me....I couldn't have asked for more loving and sustaining people in my life. <3
I am so grateful for the confidence I've been able to gain. Especially in this last production, my confidence has grown. I'm not going to say it won't fluctuate, but truly, being able to do something out of my comfort zone, such as "Sexy Sandy" and having people tell me that I was successful at it was truly, strangely, breathtaking. I can do hard things! I can expand my horizons! I'm not simply limited to one kind of character! (Though have truly enjoyed the characters I've been able to play.) I'm beautiful, hot and sexy, and I've never felt that way before. I know it isn't the most important thing in the world to be any of those things, but it was definitely liberating and a maturing experience.
I have had the most wonderful opportunities these last three years. I've received better parts than I ever could have imagined I would receive. I've been blessed with Mrs. Neylan as a fabulous director with incredible vision. I've been so blessed. I am so blessed.
